This Girl Is Super Focused - Nako Lebodi

Hey girl! New year better you. 

A few days into the year I found myself thinking about my list, you know ‘the list’. The list about the husband I’d like God to give me. I was watching a cooking show on TV and had an “aha” moment thinking to myself “I did not tell God that I would LOVE a husband that cooks”. Immediately I jotted it down in my journal. 

You might be thinking to yourself “is that really of great importance?” and my response is ABSOLUTELY. It says in the Word of God that “He will grant you the desires of your heart” and that is one of my many desires. I love how He even focuses on the tiniest of details.

However, this got me reviewing my singleness and my journey with God up until this very moment. 

Do you remember the day you got introduced to the concept of accountability? You thought it was an intrusion of your privacy - little did you know that it would save you from a lot. 

Aaah.. young Nako, new to the faith, still learning about God and discovering tonnes about self. It isn’t clear how it came about but once it did I remember clearly your leader saying “of course I’d like to know if you’re dating or seeing anyone” and your sharp tongue was quick to express how that information isn’t necessary to their life.

I remember you thinking that you own your life, therefore it isn’t mandatory to be consulting anybody about personal issues and decisions. Oh but it is - it’s needed to remain in covering to fulfil God’s plan.

Fast forward to a few years later and having a deeper understanding of God’s plan for your life and understanding the importance for family. 

2019 was the year, February was the month and all you focused on was marriage. I’m not quite sure if it was because people around you were getting into relationships, others engaged and some married. Whenever you’d get around the ladies at church that’s all you’d talk about - marriage. 

Not that it is bad but in your head you were prepared and ready which turned out to be incorrect. You then started asking God to bring you to the man you would eventually be a wife to and for a season, it was the first thing you prayed for every single time - again, not a bad thing but the motives were all the way messed up. 

You were impatient, tired and lonely and didn’t know how to find a friend in Jesus even though you know Him to be Lord and saviour; you hadn’t allowed Him to be your friend yet. See how much of a gentleman He is, He didn’t even pressure you. He waited!

Scripture would tell you that “I am the true vine, remain” says the Lord but you weren’t truly remaining in Him because whenever you’d get such thoughts you’d focus on them before turning back to the true vine. 

So back to the list, I drew one up when I started noticing a young man at church - BIG MISTAKE! Awesome guy, just not my guy however at the time my emotions were telling me otherwise. I let my leaders know immediately and always remained accountable. I thank God for guarding my heart and protecting the space that will be my husband’s because wow! I really convinced myself that we were meant to be. I then wrote my entire list which revolved around this guy but I was so unaware. Looking back I’m grateful for the words that one of my friends said to me “busy yourself with the work of the Lord, let Him be the center of all your attention. Let your husband find you while you’re completely focused on yourself and growth”. That conversation preached to me! 

After clearing my mind and receiving the “sign” I asked God to give me, I moved right on, taking the advice my friend had given me. I served better, submitting myself wholly to the House and truly busying myself with the Lord’s work. However my list was still heavily influenced by my previous infatuation, I had to make loads of edits even decided to draw up a new one altogether. That’s when I had my “aha”  moment, of I need to let God know that I’d love a man who cooks and even bakes.

I sat down, prayed, talked to Jesus about my singleness and how I’ve been so protected. I’m at a place where I’m celebrating this journey and not looking over at other people’s grass instead of watering mine. I’m blessed to have this time to be fully for God. I mean I even saved up a few bucks to purchase the cutest vintage looking diamond ring to show my commitment to Him and Him first. It is a sign of my worth and that before any man puts a ring on it, I know that God did. What I love is what it represents, how I’ve been made pure in His love and that He chose me specifically to be His bride. If I fall I will stand and choose Him again and again because I am committed to doing so. When I wake up and when I go to sleep, it is in what I feed myself, the entertainment I chose and the company I keep. The equation “time = intimacy” that the incredible Pastor Naean Moji once shared with us ladies will stick forever in my heart and I want to be intimate with God, and so I will spend all the time I can with Him and share His love with other girls and those that need it.

Written by Nako Lebodi

Nako is a part of our team at Kingdomcity in Gaborone, Botswana.