Fairytales Made Right - Mosa Mphusu

My childhood was filled with fairy tales.

I can’t even begin to calculate the amount of money that was spent on princess costumes, themed birthday parties and books. We had a full collection of the Disney princess stories and I read every single one of them, cover to cover, like my life depended on it!

I spent the majority of my time daydreaming about my ‘prince charming’, ready for him to save me from this cruel world (at the time was me trying to stuff down all my peas so I could have dessert! lol). 

This was a mindset I carried well into my teenage years, which translated to watching way too many rom-coms on the couch surrounded by used up tissues. So in my mind, all I had to do was wait for him to come and save me, to fix all my problems so we could live happily ever after with our adorable twins (yes, we even had twins), right? *chuckles to self *

I got so caught up in my fantasy with this imaginary family that it was all I could think about, it was my escape.

Every man I got close to was “the one” and I began planning our lives together, remembering to remind myself; “don’t mess this up Mosa!”

I got to this stage because I was always told that the previous standards I had set were ‘too high’ and I should just settle, because a good man is hard to come by. Such a chuckle worthy statement now…

Getting bullied in high school also took a toll on me, being treated like I was worth nothing by people that didn’t even know me. This had my mind turn “the one” into “anyone”.

Fast forward to 2019, when one of my amazing leaders shared a quote with me that she once heard during Pastor Blake’s sermon which changed her life, and now mine too;

“Self worth is the currency through which you determine what quality of life you can afford.”

I mean seriously?! SO GOOD! 

I really had to marinate on it and I wished that I had heard the full sermon. Of course, God answered my prayers and a few months later, Pastor Blake preached a sermon called ‘Perfectly Scarred’ where he mentioned the quote and it had me distraught on the floor when I was supposed to be showing people where to sit as I was serving in the Auditorium at the time... oops. 

This is the first time I forced myself to look in the mirror and realise that I didn’t think I was worth much; I became the girl that the bullies were talking about in high-school and I retreated to my fantasies because it was safe. I don’t think fairy tales are a bad thing at all, but it became a problem when I checked out of reality to live in a world that didn’t exist waiting to be saved by a man. I was saved eventually, by the one true Saviour; God fully embraced me and helped me turn my wounds into scars. 

Let me tell you a little something ladies, two important details that I learn more about each day, in Genesis 2:24 (NLT) says “This explains why a man leaves his father and mother and is joined to his wife, and the two are united into one.”

This is probably the ONLY time I truly understood math, 1+1=1. No man is supposed to “complete you”; you should already be whole when he finds you. Fill yourself daily with The Word and speak life over yourself, find out who you are and what makes you tick, by just spending time with yourself. I used to HATE being alone and I thought going to the movies alone was so depressing, now I can’t wait to get home and just chill by myself! I love getting up in the morning and listening to my favorite worship song so I can just spend time with my Father, just me and Him. I remember how much I need to cherish these times when I think about being woken up at 5am by my god-daughter because she wants to play. 

Stop looking for him, he has to find you! You are worth so much and you deserve to be discovered. But don’t just wait around, you have to be moving. Let him catch up to you, don’t slow down! 

I attended a woman’s conference many years ago and I’ll never forget at the end when we were each given a sticker with the words “You Are Enough” on it. It resonated with me so much and I looked at the sticker on the really hard days to get me through but I only understood why recently when I looked up the definition of ‘enough’: 

“Occurring in such quantity, quality, or scope as to fully meet demands, needs, or expectations.”

I am all that I need to be and more with the grace of God. I have a friend that lives miles away who I haven’t seen in years but she always knows when to remind me that “I am enough” and now it’s my turn to do the same to other women.

Written By Mosa Mphusu

Mosa lives in Gaborone, Botswana and is a part of the team at Kingdomcity.