The Miracle Baby
It’s such a beautiful thing and it’s special to have the ability to grow a human inside your womb. The process of it is special, but I didn’t do nine months... it was only six. Not that we had planned it that way at all, but it was different... Yet, throughout the whole process, you get to see God in a different perspective, like how He’s created the whole universe and then He’s also created you in your mother’s womb.
“For you created my inmost being; you knit me together in my mother’s womb. I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; your works are wonderful, I know that full well.
My frame was not hidden from you when I was made in the secret place, when I was woven together in the depths of the earth. Your eyes saw my unformed body; all the days ordained for me were written in your book before one of them came to be.”
No one really told me about the severity of the whole situation while I was pregnant. It was normal up until a check-up I had somewhere during my 6th months of pregnancy. In my mind, I’m planning all the things that are about to happen in my life and Miracle Offering was also coming up – that was on the forefront of my mind. But on the day of my appointment, I’m at the hospital by myself and sending photos to Josh, my husband, like everything is normal.
Suddenly the doctor comes in and says, “I’m here to tell you that we need to set an ambulance to pick you up to send you to the main hospital. You have preeclampsia.” This is the first time I am hearing about it, and everything escalates. Honestly, hearing that and everything that happened after, it felt like I was about to have a panic attack. I couldn’t stop shaking, and I had never had a panic attack before in my life.
Amid this chaos, I managed to catch a moment to say, “God, I need to know that you are here. You need to speak to me and show me that You are here.” As soon as I closed my eyes, I saw a picture of the Cross and I felt a gold liquid all over the room. I immediately felt a peace that I have never felt before. It was something that surpassed all understanding. How could I have peace in a chaotic situation like that? I had full peace, and it was the very first time I ever felt it, and I held on to this verse closely:
“And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.”
At the hospital, I’m wheeled to the labour room, and we started to play worship music in the room. The song that Ariella was eventually birthed to was “Goodness of God”. After Ariella was born, I saw her for three seconds and then she went to the NICU for about seven weeks. She was born nearly three months early, but she never deteriorated at all. Her growth, her weight, her ability to tolerate, to swallow, everything would spike well. I never got a call in the middle of the night for any issues for the time she was in NICU. That was a miracle.
THE MIRACLE IN PRAYER
I had to fight the spirit of fear daily. Thoughts would bombard my mind... What if my daughter is different? What if she never measures up because that’s what people say about premature babies? What if she is slower than everyone else in her development? It’s truly the hardest thing. When I was discharged from the hospital, I left without her as she still needed to be incubated. Imagine being a new mom, having just delivered and you cannot be there for your baby at all. You’re trying to produce milk, you’re trying to learn how to be a new mom and you cannot do it with your newborn baby. I just remember crying daily, thinking how I was going to do this.
You really have to fight for your peace, and not fall into the trap of fear. I had to be so aware that I was not partnering with anxiety. I constantly reminded myself that God has the best for me, and I remember Pastor Jem telling me, pray against developmental delay and the suffering that people say she might have. I did that – I prayed over her every day, and I had to be so careful who I surrounded myself with during that season. Sometimes people say things out of their own hurt or own experiences, but it might not be the same experience for you. In fighting for my peace, I took communion daily and declared the blood of Jesus over me in the power of the Cross.
“And they have conquered him by the blood of the Lamb and by the word of their testimony...”
This period of time was especially challenging for me. But I am thankful that I had Pastor Rae, who was one of the biggest supporters. She would check on me every day, asking me how I was going. I started to realise that I was good at telling people my struggles after I have a solution. But I struggled to tell people that I was struggling and didn’t have a solution. It made me realise that I needed to be more vulnerable too, and it was a time when I figured out that I needed to bring people on this journey.
THE MIRACLE IN COMMUNITY
It’s so important that the people we surround ourselves with, our community, are the ones who are able to speak life into you and call out the God destiny over your life and your child’s life. When you can’t do that for yourself, the people around you can do that for you and on your behalf.
I remember going for an ultrasound once for Ariella, and she’s moving a lot in my belly. The lady tells me, hey, she’s moving a lot and she is going to be really naughty. I immediately renounced that! She’s not going to be identified with being naughty just because she moves a lot.
“The tongue has the power of life and death...”
What I tolerate, what I don’t tolerate – it helps to have clear boundaries on what you allow in your life. Ultimately, the biggest voice that I rely on is the Holy Spirit.
THE MIRACLE IN HAVING THE HOLY SPIRIT
There's been so many times when I truly do not know what I am doing. I am upset, it’s chaotic and I just go – “Holy Spirit, what do I do?” In every moment, the Holy Spirit has been a clear voice to me – when I start to listen to fear, the Holy Spirit stops me there. When I am with Ariella now, I have many questions about raising her. What do I do? What should I do next? Am I doing this right? I don’t have all the answers, but I know that with just listening to the Holy Spirit is the best guide.
“But when the Father sends the Advocate as my representative—that is, the Holy Spirit—he will teach you everything and will remind you of everything I have told you.”
THE MIRACLE MAY NOT BE WHAT YOU EXPECT
The miracle looked different to what I expected in my mind. God has always been a God of miracles, that never changes, and it never will. But when I look at Ariella, and when I share my story, it’s incredible how much a miracle she is. The whole journey has been a miracle.
I think if there’s one thing I’ve really learned, it would be to enjoy the process. The process of pregnancy with Ariella being in my belly won’t happen again until the next kid comes, and that would be a different feeling altogether. I treasure it. Every season feels short but so enjoyable, with a long-lasting effect. I realise now that it’s about building a strong foundation for your home, ensuring you face your giants so that your kids don’t have to, and constantly creating that pathway to show them that God has called them and anointed them for revival.
“Children are a gift from the Lord; they are a reward from Him. Children born to a young man are like arrows in a warrior’s hands.”
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*Extracted from an interview with Joy Stevens
Joy is married to Josh, and they currently live in Kuala Lumpur, Malaysia. She is mom to their beautiful miracle baby Ariella, and is part of the Kingdomcity team.